{"id":14171,"date":"2017-08-18T11:11:03","date_gmt":"2017-08-18T15:11:03","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/whatsgood.vitaminshoppe.com\/?p=14171"},"modified":"2017-09-08T13:36:01","modified_gmt":"2017-09-08T17:36:01","slug":"emotional-eating","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.vitaminshoppe.com\/blog\/emotional-eating\/","title":{"rendered":"How I Stopped Eating My Feelings\u2014And Started Cooking Them Instead"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>I remember going to my Italian grandmother\u2019s house and eating mounds of pasta while watching bad hair metal on MTV (this was the \u201880s!). I was barely five but I can still taste the ice cream she served while \u201cCherry Pie\u201d by Warrant was blaring in the background.<\/p>\n<p>Grandma gave me all the food I wanted and let me watch whatever I wanted\u2014unlike my own parents, who did neither. Eating at Grandma\u2019s made me feel better about things, including my family life, which was hard because my parents fought and we all weren\u2019t very close.<\/p>\n<p>It was my grandmother who trained my mother to be a good cook. And the only time my father and I would spend time together was at dinner over those delicious meals. Food became the<em> only<\/em> way for all of us to be close. I wished we all talked more\u2014but instead we just ate. It made it seem like everything was ok.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Related: <\/strong><a href=\"https:\/\/www.vitaminshoppe.com\/blog\/2017\/07\/19\/eating-breakfast\/\"><strong>What Happened When I Finally Took Everyone\u2019s Advice And Started Eating Breakfast<\/strong><\/a><\/p>\n<p>In grade school, I didn\u2019t feel like I fit in with the other kids, so I would eat to calm my nerves. At that point, my emotional eating didn\u2019t<em> look<\/em> like a problem because I had the metabolism of a hummingbird.<\/p>\n<p>By the time I got older and went to college\u2014turning to food for comfort during all the years in between\u2014I gained weight and kept turning to unhealthy food. I might have never dealt with my emotional eating problems and depression if it wasn&#8217;t for Wendy\u2019s.<\/p>\n<p>I ate Wendy\u2019s a lot, though I barely ever stepped foot into the place. I was in a serious relationship with a girl who worked the Wendy\u2019s drive-thru, and every night she would bring home a ton of leftovers. Maybe it was hitting my twenties or eating chicken nuggets every single day, but my skinny frame began to expand\u2014and it was <em>not <\/em>muscle.<\/p>\n<blockquote><p>By the time I got older and went to college\u2014turning to food for comfort during all the years in between\u2014I gained weight and kept turning to unhealthy food.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p>This weight gain didn\u2019t change my eating habits. I did try to exercise more (and it worked to some degree) but each year it got harder. I kept eating and gaining more weight. Even when I randomly tried to diet and eat \u2018healthy,\u2019 I\u2019d buy Lean Cuisines and end up feeling unsatisfied\u2014so then I\u2019d end up eating three in a row.<\/p>\n<p>I refused to learn to cook because I was so used to others cooking for me or giving me food. And when I was out of TV dinners and stressed out about work, school, or a relationship, I\u2019d end up just giving in and getting fast food.<\/p>\n<p>I hit rock bottom in my late-20s, when I found that I was 60 pounds overweight. I just stared at the numbers on the scale and wanted to cry. I could <em>feel<\/em> the little kid in me frightened that he\u2019d have to give up eating whatever he wanted. My adult self was experiencing a harsh reality: I needed to change how I approached food. It needed food to become actual nourishment.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Related: <\/strong><a href=\"https:\/\/www.vitaminshoppe.com\/search?search=spices\"><strong>Shop spices and bring flavor to your healthy, home-cooked meals. <\/strong><\/a><\/p>\n<p>When I made the decision to really eat healthfully (I chose whole foods and more veggies over processed stuff) and deal with the emotions behind my eating, I realized that I was going to have to learn to cook\u2014for myself. It occurred to me that I had never even bothered to learn to cook! Others cooking for me was their way of showing they loved and cared about me, so I needed to show love to myself by cooking healthy food for <em>myself.<\/em><\/p>\n<p><strong>Related: <\/strong><a href=\"https:\/\/www.vitaminshoppe.com\/blog\/2017\/07\/26\/trauma-mindfulness\/\"><strong>Mindfulness Tips From A Former Stress Junkie<\/strong><\/a><\/p>\n<p>Cookbooks and YouTube videos became my best friends and my confidants. I dusted off (yes, they were literally dusty) my measuring cups and created a cooking area. It was difficult at first, and my fianc\u00e9 politely lied to me about the first couple of meals being good.<\/p>\n<p>But I got the hang of it, and I actually started to love the process. Cooking was like learning a new language: It was math, science, and art all rolled into one. It empowered me to know that I was responsible for what I ate, and I started to see food as fuel and art instead of an ephemeral escape.<\/p>\n<blockquote><p>Others cooking for me was their way of showing they loved and cared about me, so I needed to show love to myself by cooking healthy food for <em>myself.<\/em><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p>After cooking every day, my kitchen skills have really improved, and my fianc\u00e9\u2019s appreciation of home-cooked meals has as well. She had done all the cooking up to this point, but now I\u2019ve claimed the kitchen, as well, and it\u2019s really become a creative space for me. It\u2019s brought us closer and made dinner more intimate. I take my time to savor the meal as we talk and enjoy the food that I cook.<\/p>\n<p>And becoming passionate about cooking started a domino effect of healthy habits. When I\u2019m feeling high or low, or if I need to get centered, I spend some time in my garden and then I cook a healthy meal.<\/p>\n<p>I don\u2019t eat my feelings now; I cook them. The cravings have gone away and I am halfway towards reaching my weight-loss goals. It has increased my self-esteem and I am much more willing to try things that once seemed impossible. (Example: As someone who works in publishing, I finally attempted to learn Photoshop and print interior design\u2014if I could cook, I could design covers and books!)<\/p>\n<p>The biggest change and benefit of cooking my own food has not been the weight loss, though. It has been an inner bonding between my adult self and my inner child. Cooking has become a way for me to be a responsible adult, while tending to the little kid in me that learned to eat away his feelings and anxiety. I understand now that I am responsible for my own health\u2014<em>and<\/em> the kid in me gets to enjoy the food I make with love.<\/p>\n<p>That feeling I looked forward to experiencing when I visited my grandma is now something I get to experience on a daily basis.<\/p>\n<p>Being healthier has helped my nerves and my depressive symptoms. It has enabled me to see the world as a kid again, when there were always new discoveries. My grandma has been gone for a while, but I know she\u2019d be proud that I\u2019m learning to cook healthy food that tastes just as good as her own.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>From eating my feelings to cooking them, I&#8217;ve almost reached my weight loss goals. <a class=\"more-link\" href=\"https:\/\/www.vitaminshoppe.com\/blog\/emotional-eating\/\">Read More <span class=\"screen-reader-text\">How I Stopped Eating My Feelings\u2014And Started Cooking Them Instead<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":144,"featured_media":14188,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[5,7,8,9],"tags":[578],"class_list":["post-14171","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-health","category-nutrition","category-stories","category-the-latest","tag-eating"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- 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